Wow, I'm terrible at keeping up with this. More so than I thought!
I had lunch with a great friend of mine and was discussing my Facebook fast, and she mentioned that she almost never checks Facebook (which I knew because she took a long while to respond to any of my posts) and I inquired as to why. It wasn't a matter of taking the time, she basically gave me the answer that I had given someone else. It really causes you to compare yourself to others who are at a different station in life, one that we both hope for and have yet to get to. It's not just about relationship status, but seeing wedding and baby photos or even things about travel. We are genuinely happy for those people, but it plants a small seed of jealousy because we would love to have those experiences as well. I know that being in a relationship, married, and/or having kids is not a fairy tale and is more work than some let on, BUT it is something that we desire. So, seeing it what feels like ALL the time in our face, and what feels like EVERYONE has creates an unnecessary feeling. I don't like that part at all and frankly one of the things I miss the least. I'd much rather hear about such things in one-on-one settings with that person or hanging out in a small group of friends.
I won't lie, before this fast I would have been the first person to change my relationships status and link myself with that person had I entered into a new relationship. Now, I would much rather keep it private and hold that to myself and keep it between me and that other person and of course share with those closest to me. Really! It's insane how fast people change their status from engaged to married, I'm almost surprised it's not included in the vows these days. "I now pronounce you husband and wife, congratulations, you may now change your relationship status on Facebook!"
You may sense a bit of jealousy or bitterness and are thinking "She's only saying this stuff because she's single and lonely." NO! I truly believe that we put too much value on keeping what I think should be more private, a public matter. As I have stated in previous posts, the fact that I specifically have had to tell friends to call me when they get engaged before they post it on Facebook is so crazy to me. Again, I realize it's an easy way to get the message to the masses, but aren't we close enough friends that you can tell me personally? I should hope so!
It's a different world and things change rapidly from single to married and it's complicated... but we can't forget to keep it real and that people aren't always online to catch what's happening in life!
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